Time elapsed in this book: 2 weeks
Length of their junior year: 3 years, 2 weeks
Jessica’s love interest: A.J. Morgan
Entertainment rating: 10/10
This book was one of my faves as a kid! I was so excited to reread this, and it did NOT disappoint!
The cover: Amy writes in a slam book while Jess looks over her shoulder. I hate Amy’s insanely baggy and extremely unattractive blouse, but I love Jessica’s sweater! It’s bright and fun and makes me think I need to knit myself a similar sweater. I should start looking for a pattern after posting this recap….
We open with Amy saying they should start slam books at Sweet Valley High. Basically, everyone buys a notebook and writes a category on each page, then passes the book around for others to write down names in each category. Liz thinks this could lead to hurt feelings, but Jess does not share her concerns!
Slam books begin the next day! Jess writes Bruce Patman for “Most Conceited” and Peter DeHaven for “Biggest Nerd.” Later, when everyone’s comparing their books, Jess sees A.J. Morgan listed as “Most Fascinating New Male” (what an oddly specific category). She asks who A.J. is, and Lila fills her in: A.J. stands for Adam Joseph. He’s the new handsome, tall, redhead army brat from Atlanta. Jess sees him and is convinced she’s in love.
The other girls laugh about Jess winning “Biggest Flirt,” but Jess is outraged! She doesn’t consider herself a flirt and doesn’t want A.J. to think she is either. She runs into him and gets so tongue tied that she couldn’t flirt even if she wanted to. Later, with friends, she runs into him again, and the same thing happens. Lila and Cara assume Jess is trying to prove she’s not a flirt and tell her she’s overdoing it.
Amy comes up with another idea for the slam books: a Crystal Ball section with future predictions like “Most Likely to Get Married First” and “Most Likely to be on the Cover of People Magazine.” Jess can already picture her name with A.J.’s under “Future Couples!”
Story time! After reading this book, some friends and I decided to start our own slam books, which I’m pretty sure were sheets of paper stapled together and not notebooks. The thing I most remember about them is that our own Crystal Ball section included the category “Most Likely to Have Four Kids” (inspired by a category in this book). A girl in my class who had like 8 siblings was everyone’s obvious choice. Unfortunately, she got really upset and complained to the teacher, who then had a talk with all of us about slam books being hurtful and needing to end. Thus concludes my brief foray into the slam book experience.
Back to SVH: Olivia is putting together a new literary magazine. Not to be critical, but… who’s the audience for this? The same people devouring Liz’s gossip column in the Oracle? I don’t think so. Olivia’s throwing herself into this to distract herself from the fact that her relationship with Roger Barrett Patman is falling apart.
Jeffrey tells Liz about the photo essay he’s doing for the literary magazine: photos showing a girl in a state of transition, from moody to radiant. He says Liz’s face is too sunny, so he wants Olivia to be the model. Liz agrees Olivia has a unique face and then tries to convince herself that things are fine between herself and Jeffrey. The amount of angst she continually has about Jeffrey is unreal.
Slam books are passed around, and Liz is shocked to see Olivia and Jeffrey under “Future Couples.” Lila says it’s a dumb combination, since they’re both dating other people, but Jess reports that Olivia and Roger broke up! Liz tries to brush it off, and Jess says she’s too trusting.
Friday night, Jess primps for the basketball game so she can look good for A.J., who’s on the team. After SVH wins, the gang goes to the Dairi Burger to celebrate and slam books come out. A.J. says that at his old school, he was always voted for stuff like “Reddest Head.” He flips through one and says that he doesn’t think of Jess as a big flirt. Jessica’s heart soars! Then he notices the Jeffrey and Olivia pairing under “Future Couples,” which makes everyone but Liz laugh. Under that, someone’s written in Liz and A.J.! Jessica is furious.
The next day, Jeffrey calls to say he’s on his way out to a photo shoot with “Liv” because the light is perfect. Liz wonders when he started calling Olivia “Liv.” I wonder too. He says he’ll pick Liz up for the beach around two.
Two comes and goes without any sign of Jeffrey. Eventually, Cara comes over and tells Liz she saw Jeffrey and Olivia embracing at a rest stop! Liz is pissed and heads to the beach. Lila is already there, looking like an absolute queen in a shiny gold bathing suit on a towel that says THE RITZ. She asks Liz where Jeffrey is. Liz says apparently he’s in love with Olivia. Lila is shocked and offers to talk to Jeffrey on Liz’s behalf. Liz says sure, then decides to flirt with A.J. to get over Jeffrey.
Jeffrey and Olivia finally appear around four. Jeffrey tells Liz he can explain, but Liz blows him off and says she needs to go meet A.J. for windsurfing. I find it odd that Mr. “Just Moved From Atlanta” knows how to windsurf. Lila tells Jeffrey that of course Liz doesn’t want to hang out with a rest stop cheater like him. Olivia says that’s not what happened! She says she had something in her eye, so Jeffrey tilted her head back to take a look. This always felt like a weird excuse to me, even as a kid. It would have been more believable to say Jeffrey was comforting her about her breakup with Roger. They probably were making out at a rest stop! Anyway, Lila says that she’ll talk to Liz and that if she can’t convince Liz that Jeffrey wasn’t cheating… she’ll treat him to dinner at L’Escalier, a ritzy French restaurant. Everyone gasps! Lila talks to Liz, then returns and says she owes Jeffrey dinner. They make plans for that night.
Liz continues to pursue A.J. to the point where he thinks she’s too aggressive. Jess is furious about all of this.
Olivia tells Jess the Liz/Jeffrey problems started with the “Future Couples,” so she wants to find out who paired up Olivia and Jeffrey, since that person has it out for Liz and Jeffrey. They see Lila and Jeffrey together (Lila calls him “Jeff,” which made me laugh) and Olivia realizes Lila might be behind this! Lila did, after all, have a crush on Jeffrey when he first moved to Sweet Valley, and she lost a bet to take him out for a romantic dinner. They decide to collect all the slam books (ostensibly for an Oracle article) and see whose book the Olivia/Jeffrey paring is not written in, since they assume whoever wrote it wouldn’t have done so in their own book. I don’t get their logic, but as a kid with my own slam book, I took this lesson to heart: anytime I wanted to cover up something I wrote (like my own name under some awesome category), I made sure to write it in my own slam book too. I wasn’t going to get caught like this!
Sure enough, when they look through the slam books, Lila’s doesn’t have Olivia and Jeffrey as a “Future Couple!” They take this as proof that Lila’s behind everything and race to tell Liz their discovery. Liz can’t believe she fell for Lila’s devious plot and hurries to find Jeffrey so they can make up.
The literary magazine, which Olivia titled Visions, comes out, and they have a small party in the Oracle office for her. I’m pretty sure we never hear about this magazine again.
Jess, Olivia, and Liz get back at Lila by adding “Class Sneak” as a new category in a bunch of slam books and writing down Lila’s name. What a terrible revenge plot. It tracks for Liz and Olivia, but I expected something better from Jess.
Up next: are Jess and A.J. meant to be?